There was a time when I did not understand how all of this time space reality truly works and works well.
There was a time when every fiber of my being was involved in protecting me from hurt, betrayal, sadness, anger and frustration. There was a time when every fiber of my being was involved in trying to do everything right and be a good, no perfect person. In that time I learned that trying to protect yourself “from” those experiences is futile and that being right, good and perfect is an ever changing role depending on your vantage point.
I learned eventually that most people are doing the same thing. In a seemingly never ending struggle needing to be constantly vigilant against not only others but against yourself you lose who you are and forget to live.
I learned that every time I experienced any negative emotion I chose the emotion because I forgot who I was and anyone involved in the drama of that choice also was forgetting who they were. I began to question why I chose those emotions and reached a place where I knew I no longer ever had to choose them again.
I learned that I had an inner knowing that always leads me in the right direction. I can choose to ignore it and still sometimes do but the results are always not to my liking but I don’t worry about it for I can choose again.
I learned that I am already inherently good and perfectly me and what is right for me is only right for me and other people’s opinions have nothing to do with me.
This knowledge gives me the freedom to move about this cabin of life freely. I can take chances and easily whether any result. I can live authentically and love who I am. I can love more fully and laugh more often and be thrilled about life in every moment. I am immune to negative emotion if I choose while still being fully engaged and deeply involved.
I now have the freedom to do with my life as I choose, to do what I love without guilt or worry, to love whom I want to love without concern for reciprocation and to expect out of life exactly what I want to get out of life.
I am still the same person only more alive and me. I can be boring at times and exciting other times. I can be serious and then frivolous. I can be in charge in some situations and completely surrender to the moment in others. I can paint the town all colors of the rainbow or sit home and read a good book. I can do anything and find the beauty in that moment.
All it took was to remember that I am magnificent and spectacular and amazing. That I am all that and unlimited and eternal. That I am that because I exist and nothing I or anyone else can say or do can change that. It is my truth and it is you
