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How to Eliminate the Stress of Dealing with Difficult People




Difficult people are a reflection of your own insecurities and judgments manifesting in your life.  It is a distasteful yet powerful pill to swallow.  The annoying person is right there, up close and annoyingly personal and it might be me right now telling you that you are the powerful orchestrator of this rendezvous with annoyance.  The rude person is very real and harsh in your experience and yet I am telling you, you are the powerful orchestrator of this interaction.

You can find thousands of people who will be happy to confirm your assessment of the annoying person, or the rude person, or the harshly unsupportive person, or the demeaning person, and the list is endless.  All that confirmation and support is well meaning but doesn’t recognize how powerful you are.  These are people who don’t yet recognize how powerful they are either.

The truth is that when you start recognizing how magnificent and amazing you truly are just because you exist, all encounters change.  In order to see that about yourself you must also know that about everyone else.  Therefore it is not a lofty, spiritual trait to be nonjudgmental but rather a smart way to make your dreams come true.  It is healthier than eating right and exercising.

Being nonjudgmental is not to be confused with not having passionate preferences for if you are living fully you will have preferences.  Honor your preferences but have the ability to allow others to have theirs without judgment.

Here is the quick list of ways to own your magnificence while you swallow the pill that will allow you to master your life and make it become the heaven you truly can live here in this physical existence.

  1. See the perpetrator of the action or behavior you “prefer” not to experience as a small child who doesn’t truly know what they are saying or doing.  You can also see them as an animal in a painful trap lashing out at anything because of the pain they are in.  There is no person alive who can act in a hurtful way that isn’t in pain.  It is never about you regardless of the circumstances.
  2. At the moment you experience a negative emotion as a reaction to someone else, take your attention to the feeling of your breath flowing in and out of your nose or mouth.
  3. If you have the presence of mind to look inward and truly understand you are the orchestrator of this experience and you are choosing your reaction to it, then by all means look inward.  Look for evidence of an insecurity you still have, or a judgment, or a belief that isn’t serving you.  If you find it then affirm your magnificence, or their magnificence, or replace the outdated belief with one that does serve you.
  4. You will find as you practice these simple techniques that you will encounter less of these behaviors in your personal experience and at some point even feel compassion for those in pain enough to engage in these behaviors.
  5. When you find yourself drawn into the camaraderie of complaining about others or circumstances realize that the complaining will ensure more of this in your experience.  Whatever your powerful mind and emotions spend time on will become manifest in your life.  So choose your thoughts wisely and let your emotions be your guide in whether you are creating a great next moment or more drama.

Lastly be gentle and kind with yourself because you have layers of habit and reinforced training that can be very resistant to change.  At first not much may change but if you continue to apply these techniques you will find evidence of change miraculously appearing in your world

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